So, in therapy I am talking about my knees
and my life.
Basically, I'm talking about how bad my knees hurt
and how much I need to get them fixed, and how I'm NOT DOING ANYTHING ABOUT IT.
My word for this is inertia, which means
"a tendency to do nothing or to remain unchanged."
Everyone in the world I have talked to
who has had their knees replaced
says the same thing:
"Don't wait! I wish I had done them years ago."
I haven't talked to a single negative person.
I have however, read a few horror stories
on the internet, which scared me.
I'm also the strong one.
I am the tough one. The stoic one.
I take care of everyone.
I don't want anyone (especially my husband)
taking care of me for however long it takes.
So, the long range goal is to get my knees fixed.
The short range goals are different.
We talk about how I have taken care of everyone
for a long time - except for myself.
I don't practice SELF-CARE.
So, in order to practice self-care,
I went to the doctor today and got
paperwork for bloodwork, a mammogram,
colonoscopy, you know, all the good, fun stuff.
Now to just get it done.
The therapist and I also talked about cooking.
Which sounds weird, I know.
I love to cook.
I HATE HATE to clean up the kitchen.
I mean, I would rather do almost anything
than clean up a dirty kitchen.
And there's a reason for that.
When you're a wife and mother,
you spend a lot of time in the kitchen.
Planning meals, cooking meals, making messes,
cleaning up, washing, drying, putting away.
And I don't know about anyone else, but for me,
I am always the LAST one to sit down and eat.
Without fail. And I am tired.
And my knees are painful at the end of cooking.
So in talking to my therapist, I had a revelation.
I HAVE A DISHWASHER!
A brand new dishwasher that has been sitting
in my kitchen for three years and has
been used once.
And still has two pans in it from the one time
I used it.
My therapist sort of looked at me like I was nuts.
"You have a dishwasher?"
"That is brand new and has only been used once?"
"And STILL has dishes in it from that first wash?
"And you hate doing the dishes?"
"Have you thought about using the dishwasher to help you clean up the kitchen?"
I guess I am not the sharpest tool in the shed.
So Assignment #1 for the week is, guess what?
USE THE DISHWASHER. Duh.
I think I can do that.
The other thing we talked about was eating.
I told her that my husband keeps late hours
and eats at "interesting" times.
Like breakfast at 12pm, sometimes no lunch,
and dinner at 9pm.
Which is so bad for me.
He often goes to bed at 1am or later.
Bad, bad, bad for me.
Because I am starting to follow his habits.
My husband has also told me to eat what I want
at whatever time I want and he will get his own food.
So Assignment #2 is to eat my own way.
Which is less meat, lots of salads, fruit, veggies.
And at the times I want.
And eat it early and go to bed earlier.
I can try to do that.
So, I would like to hear from people
who ACTUALLY use their dishwasher.
How often and what dishes do you put in?
Do you pre-rinse?
When do you empty?
My husband says he will empty the dishwasher
and put the dishes away if I will load it up.
Now, that's teamwork!
Having a therapist is a very great thing.